Maundering / by Kenneth Dixon

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April 18th '17 7:03pm

The NBA playoffs are on so that's been most of the excitement of my day. Kendrick Lamar just dropped his DNA video earlier today so that was pretty enjoyable to watch. It doesn't surprise me when I see music and visual art from him be presented in a such a creative way. It's very inspiring and I imagine a vast amount of time was spent cultivating those concepts. But I can't forget about J Cole's recent documentary that aired on HBO last weekend. Though not all the shots were as clean and concise, what overshadowed those nuances was what Cole is known most for, story telling. The audio was clear and easy to discern. Where camera work and resolution quality lacked, the editing mended the job. That being said, I respect both Cole and Kendrick's artistry on so many levels. Lately, I can't seem to get my sense of purpose, or lack thereof, off of my mind. It hasn't been that long since I've had a shoot, seeing as though I had a blast in Austin capturing different scenes in new territory, but I haven't acquired a paid shoot. A couple inquiries here and there but they're all at home or outside of Texas. I'm itching to shoot, I think when I'm not creating, that's when my sense of creativity and self-esteem dwindle down. And once I'm on to the next adventure, the high returns leaving me on cloud 9. But I want to stay on 9! I need to stay on 9. My soul is dying to stay on 9. Just for a little while. A bit. Enough for me to establish something and feel comfortable. But maybe that's not what I'm supposed to be feeling. Maybe I'm supposed to be growing in ways that I cannot yet see. Either way, it's nerve wrecking, despite my knowing things will work out in my favor. I'm chasing my life's work, thinking of my next big "project", but I don't know where to start. Where I'd like to begin is abroad. Asia to be exact or Africa. Speaking of I need to get in tune with Solomon. He's creating dope art pieces and helping share the struggles in Africa. Teaming up with him would be great. Give his page some new visuals and different perspectives. If not, the Motherland is still a place I desire to step foot on. New Mexico and Nola are on the horizon as far as the states go. I just need to stack a little bit more bread and cop a few new pieces of equipment. And even if I don't, I'll make the most of it with what I have, or what I can rent and borrow. It's 2 am now. Had to step away from the beginning of this meditation to get a quick workout in at the gym. My eyes are getting heavy. I miss you G.